Well this is interesting

I have been a bit mad over the last few days. I decided that I better sort out my garden. Now I didn’t take a photo of before but these are the afters

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And if you were in any doubt20141116_160737 20141116_160744

That would be 21 black sacks brimming. Now of course, I decided to clear out the loft, I am putting so much stuff for sell it is silly. After the loft is the garage.

The thing is, this is doing two things, it is keeping me in my home, I don’t have to move far to get to my garden. The garage is about 5 steps away, the loft is in my house. I am selling stuff to big to post so it is collection only. OH is on holiday next week so he can open the door and give stuff.

The other thing it is doing is distracting me, I can feel this feeling I have had for the past few weeks slipping away and the voices in my head getting steadly louder. When the woman came last week, I explained to her I knew my cycle and while it might be weeks or months I know I am going to go back downhill. She expressed her view that if I did a lot of positive thinking then this might not happen. I do see her point, but I am unsure of how me thinking I AM not going to go back and let depression win, is going to ulter the brain chemistry in my head and stablise it out. But I have tried everything else, so I might as well give this a go.

I also went to my doctor on Monday, she expressed concern that I hadn’t been seen by a shrink, and that really, while CBT and therapy is a good way to go, even this could actually be detriminatal if they are treating the wrong thing. Its a bit like treating a broken leg with chemo.

Hopefully with her pushing something will come of it

This entry was posted in disbaility, Mental Health, OCD and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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