I know its been a while, but the truth is I haven’t felt like writing, its just one of those things, that if you can’t you can’t.

However I have found something to write about which is exciting for everyone.

Yesterday my beautiful cousin got married, I mentioned this a while ago because I was unsure about whether to accept or not as it would depend on where I was in general whether I could get there and how I would be with the crowd (even though the crowd would be mainly my family) and not to mention that if my depression hit on the day I wouldn’t leave the house. It was a truely horrible decision but in the end I decided it was safer not to go, because she would be paying per seat whether there was a bum on that seat or not.

And would you adam and eve it I was fine yesterday, I (and my OH) are doing certain things that are really helping, like going to various theme parks during the week, when its not busy, cycle rides, we love biking and it is keeping us fit, which apparently I need since someone asked me when the baby was due.

I am gutted I missed the wedding, however if I had said yes I bet I wouldn’t of been able to make it, added to this two of my other cousins have just had babies and they would of been there and I am still not in a great place with new babies and pregnant people, so it is a high chance I would of been depressed today if I had gone. I know this seems very self centered and it is but depression is a very selfish disease and at times to keep yourself safe you need to be selfish.

But it looks like I am back and I am sure all 99 followers have missed, just that one more till I hit the hundred, so feel free to reblog :-p

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