Like many others I was shocked with the rape that happened by the Stanford Student, not only just by the crime itself but the father’s letter to try and justify it and I thought her letter to the courts (you can read it here) hit the nail on the head. Too him it might have been just twenty minutes but to her this is going to last a lifetime and as she said she is forever changed by it.
In no other crime do we blame the victim as much as we do in rape crimes. Its all about what the victim wore, how drunk they were, if they flirted with their rapist, their past sex life is brought in and the victim is time and time again forced to relive something that was out of their control.
I honestly believe it wouldn’t have mattered slept with 200 men, be so drunk I had stripped naked and was flirting like mad, it gives no one more right to touch me than if I was a virgin, sober and sittting in a corner reading a book and this culture of we should bring up our girls to not dress like this, not to drink too much, not to flirt too much, when maybe we should bring our son’s up to respect women. If they say no, thats what it means.
And on no condition should be at any point excuse a crime. It being the first time the person ever did it, he is such a nice boy. Well Ted Bundy’s neighbours thought he was lovely and look how that turned out.
And if in any doubt think about it like asking someone if they want a cup of tea