I don’t want to jinx it but….

This is probably the most stable I have been in months. It has been a weird realisation, that somehow, my bipolar has stabilised *touch wood* I had a brief manic time a few weeks ago, but it was short lived. Its the one thing I am grateful for with having rapid cycling, I would hate to be manic for months. Last time it lasted for more than a week, I was redecorating and then followed a bad depressive stage.

However the anxiety and the OCD are making up for that, I am finding myself getting more panicy when things are not going just so, if I am a few minutes late walking the dog, if the cleaning is not done before midday. I still cling onto what is the worse that can happen, but then anxiety voice kicks in and tells me exactly what could go wrong.

The only good thing, is I have several attempts to change my routine (which is what my OCD is based on) most have been successful, little and not too often, so I have hopes I can control that.

The anxiety though, I think I am going to have to get more professional help, maybe see if there are any online things I can do.

If this keeps on, I might have to get off my arse and find a job and become a productive member of society.